Pump Up Your Book Chats with Bronwyn Storm

There was only one thing Bronwyn wanted to be when she grew up: a superhero. Sadly, this goal was made moot when she realized that being a klutz was not, in fact, a super power, and her super-weakness for anything bright and shiny meant that a magpie with self-control could easily defeat her in a battle of wills. So, she turned to writing as a way to unleash her inner superhero. She doesn’t get to live on a secret space station orbiting the earth (and thank goodness because she gets motion sick on a merry-go-round), but she still get to wear leotards, a cape and say things like, “STAND ASIDE! THIS IS A JOB FOR WRITING-GIRL!”

Bronwyn’s latest book is Ethan’s Chase.

You can visit her website at www.bronwynstorm.com.

About Ethan’s Chase

Still wounded from a disastrous love affair, advertising executive Ethan Phillips has spent the past five years outwitting Cupid with a series of dekes and fakes. Who knew the tricky cherub would get wise?

Rather than piercing Ethan’s heart with an arrow, he douses it with amaretto-flavored milk. A quick visit to the drycleaner and a stern lecture on the dangers of gorgeous, charming women, and he figures he’s made another clean getaway. But when the sexy woman turns out to be Chase Logan, his new systems programmer, Ethan’s got nowhere to run. Suddenly, the man who spent his time running from Cupid, is now looking to borrow a few arrows. Ethan’s ready to give chase and pursue love.

Will he catch the heart of his programmer or just be left catching his breath?

Q: Thank you for this interview, Bronwyn. Can you tell us why you wrote your book?

I suffer from a highly debilitating disease called TNTLS, otherwise known as Talk Now, Think Later Syndrome.  It’s one of those terrible illnesses that also encompasses other syndromes, like Foot In Mouth Disorder and Just Because It Was In My Head Doesn’t Mean It Should Come Out Of My Mouth Malady.  While I’ve suffered greatly from TNTLS, I’d say the people around me have suffered more…especially when they’re trying to explain why I 1) shouldn’t be arrested 2) should be arrested, but they shouldn’t 3) why I need serious medical care and shouldn’t be allowed out of the white, padded room 4) why the Human Rights Act prevents them from locking me in my study for the rest of my unnatural (because nothing is natural about me) life…so, the short answer to the question is this: I have a big mouth and I opened it.

The longer answer is this: I was reading this truly horrific romance novel…you know the kind, the one with the external conflict a five year old could solve (in, like, two seconds and then demand their Kool-Aid and cookie)…maybe you’ve read one of these story I’m babbling talking about: The heroine needs the rind of an orange, and the hero needs the inside, but oh-uh!! There’s only ONE orange. What are they going to do? So the reader suffers through hundreds of pages of “come here” “go away,” abuse masquerading as “he’s mopey and brooding, and has trust issues,” dysfunction pretending to be conflict, hot sex, more sex, and oh, look, more sex and right when she hits the 1000th orgasm, she realizes she really loves him, but boo hoo, there’s that problem of the orange. Then she either gets pregnant and runs away, or sees him having dinner with another woman and runs away, or realizes it’ll never work in this mad, one orange world, and runs away.

Inevitably, she gets hits by a truck or car (no doubt, driven by the now, completely pissed off romance reader). Then, she wakes up in a hospital, sees him. He’s all “oh, I love you!” and she says, “It won’t work. There’s only one orange.” Then he solves it all by saying, “No, we can share the orange.” Then there’s more sex…well, except for the reader who’s too busy trying to stop the blood pouring out of their eyes to even consider having sex.

It was one of those books and I was so mad and annoyed and ticked off and vexed and…well, you get the point.  And I thought (then said because of my TNTLS), “My God.  Either it’s wwwaayyy harder to write a romance than to read it, or this author doesn’t have anyone who loved her enough to tell her to deepen the conflict…can it be that difficult to write a story?”

And then, I decided to take my foot out of my mouth and put my money there, because I like to mash up clichés…but also because I thought, “Yeah, big mouth. Easy to criticize while on the sidelines. You do it.”  And I was right and wrong. It is WAY harder to write a story than I’d thought it would be, but I still don’t think that author had proper crit partners.

Q: Which part of the book was the hardest to write?

The part that’s between the front cover and the back cover.

Q: Does your book have an underlying message that readers should know about?

Yes: There is no problem that can’t be solved by chocolate.  It’s an underlying message in all my stories.  In Ethan’s Chase, the other message is that the heart is not always wrong and a first impression isn’t always right.

Q:  What was one of your favorite books as a child?

Too many to name.  I loved Gordon Kormon and Beverly Cleary, Judy Blume and Richard Peck…my dad says when I was very small (three years old), they thought I was a genius…my dad says he came into the living room one day and found me sitting with a book in my lap, reading it word for word, turning the pages at the exact right time…it took them a bit to realize I wasn’t reading, I had just memorized everything…

I would love to know what story so got to me, I memorized it word for word…but my parents can’t remember the title.  All my dad remembers was the line, “ME-GA-BOOM!!!!! THIS CANDY FLOSS TASTES GGGGOOOOODDDDD!!!”

And in that one line, I know why that was my favorite book: candy, made-up word, and yelling.

Q: What is your favorite book as an adult?

I don’t have a favorite book…I read according to my mood. So days where I want to laugh, I’ll bring out Vicki Lewis Thompson or Janet Evanovich. Days I want to laugh AND have the pants scared off me, I’ll pull out Dean Koontz, days that I want to feel magic, I read Zach Helm (Stranger than Fiction) or J.K. Rowling.

Q: What are you reading now?

Books, two to be exact.

Oh…you want titles?  Gotcha.

Revenge of the Witch – Joseph Delaney and One for the Money – Janet Evanovich.

Q: Do you remember when the writing bug hit?

To be honest, I never dreamed of being a writer.  I really wanted to be a superhero…but then I realized that people who injure themselves rolling out of bed shouldn’t wear capes or tights, or carry laser weapons.  I thought about a career in law, then psychology, then teaching, then I opened my big mouth and five years later, I’m a writer…so I don’t know if I was bitten by the bug, or if I bit the bug, but either way, thank God for incisors, because I LOVE this job.

Q: Besides books, what else do you write?  Do you write for publications?

I’ve done a few articles on defining romance, querying, and writing blurbs for my publisher, The Wild Rose Press.  I also have a variety of Free Reads (non-fiction and fiction) on my website.

Q: Do you have a writing tip you’d like to share?

This is why I think writers should be true to their writing voices.  Let’s be honest, it’s not like being yourself will mean people won’t laugh at you…heck, they might laugh more, but at least you’ll know they’re laughing at the genuine article…

My tip: stay true to your voice, don’t try to be something you’re not…for example, when I was fourteen, I was coming back from the mall with my older sister and younger brother. He was eight, and we’d sandwiched him between us for safety, and I was on the outside part of the sidewalk…so, we’re walking and talking, and then I tried to be something I wasn’t—namely, someone cool and sophisticated.  In trying to make some point on the topic we were discussing, I tossed my head back and then tried to give my brother The Cool Sophisticated Look…and promptly fell off the sidewalk.  So, not only did I NOT manage to look cool or sophisticated, but I hurt my neck, twisted my ankle, and had my brother and sister laughing their butts off all the way home.

Q:  Would you like to tell us about your home life?  Where you live?  Family?  Pets?

I’m Canadian, eh?  Edmonton, Alberta, to be exact.  As for my home life, it’s torture. Hell. Hades.

I’m not kidding.

Listen, I used to be this perfectly self-sufficient woman who could do all sorts of things, like cook, do laundry, and shovel walks…then I met my husband…now, if he goes out and doesn’t make dinner, I eat cereal then WHINE LIKE AN OVER-TIRED TWO-YEAR-OLD about how there was nothing to eat…my God. What happened to me?  It’s so bad, he’ll either cook extra food the night before, or tell me to order in…I am the shame of my entire family.  The women in my family can capital-c, Cook.  I can’t even tell Swiss char from rhubarb…they won’t even acknowledge me when we’re in the grocery store…my family, not the vegetables…

And it just gets worse.  I have two cats and two dogs, and they’re either hogging the bed, stealing the blankets, taking my food, demanding belly rubs, taking me for walks, playing tag with me, or coming for cuddles…the most terrible thing is they love to cuddle AND sleep, and every time I see them, they’re trying to convince me I need to nap…

Sigh…I guess we all have our crosses to bear, and this, hard, hard life is just mine…

Q: Where’s your favorite place to write at home?

I always write in my study…when I’m allowed to write, that is. I don’t know what it is about the furry ones and sensing work in the air…but the connection turns my day into a crazy obstacle game…first, I have to side-step Gus who races me to the study, then I have to race for the seat before Murphy dives under the desk and takes up all the foot room, then I have convince Remus that my papers are for editing, not sleeping on, and finally I have explain to Milo that I don’t need any help with typing and the keyboard wires are not some strange animal life that I need protecting from…I tell you, by the time that’s all done, it’s lunch time and I need a nap.

Q: What do you do to get away from it all?

Oooohhh, now my Type A, over-achieving personality gets outed…I haven’t figured out yet how to get away from it all…heck, I haven’t even figured out how to get away from 20% of it…the awesome thing about working from home is getting to wear sweats, eating tons of chocolate, taking t.v. breaks, and having a short commute.

The bad thing is that I can’t figure out how to stop working…I teach adult writing classes, host writing workshops for teens and adults, and I’m the Writer in Residence for an elementary school, so there’s always something to do for lesson plans…and I have a dozen crit partners, so there’s always cool stuff to edit…and then there’s my own writing and editing…so honestly, on weekends, I try to work “get away from it all” by working half-day, and when I feel like getting REALLY crazy, I’ll go to work in my p.js.

Q: Were you the kind of child who always had a book in her hand?

Yes, but that’s because I found a good, weighty volume smacked upside the head of the bully would stun them and give me enough time to run and hide…

Q: Can you remember your favorite book?

ME-GA-BOOM!!! THIS CANDY FLOSS TASTES GGGGOOOOODDDD!!!!

Q: Do you remember writing stories when you were a child?

Nah, I did a lot of sad, mopey poetry.  I’d corner my sister and try to read it to her, but she’d always scream something about the Geneva Convention, and then hide under the bed.

Q: What was the first thing you did as far as promoting your book?

Man, I called/emailed everybody I knew, took friends who had a background in marketing out for dinner and picked their brains, made friends with every author I came across (not for promotion, but for support and tips), called up chain and independent book stores to have author signings, gave away swag to anyone who asked (and tons of people who didn’t), ordered promotional magnets for my car, signed up with Pump Up My Book…name it, I did it…

Q: Are you familiar with the social networks and do you actively participate?

I’m on Facebook (under Natasha Deen), and Goodreads, and I blog, but I don’t use Twitter…I have an account, but I’m a rambler.  The only things I can say in less than 140 words are: Me hungry. Me tired. Me need grammar lessons.

Q: How do you think book promotion has changed over the years?

It’s gone to the internet, which is lovely and not so lovely. Not so lovely because you don’t get as much of a chance to meet in person (unless you arrange something), but the nice thing is less travel (which means less fuel being pushed into the environment), and you can reach more people.

Q: What is the most frustrating part of being an author?

So, all joking aside, I don’t know if there is a “most frustrating.” Lots of things are frustrating—when publishing companies close or when you’re writing one kind of story, but the market dictates another—but I don’t know if anything reaches “most” level…plus, I think the things that are hard about this industry are hard in ANY industry.  I mean, if you don’t get accepted, whether it’s for school, job, or a book, it sucks, period…

I think if I had to pick something that’s “most” frustrating, I guess it would be to keep a level head and optimism when the industry shifts and changes, and the standards that were current are suddenly out of date…but I stick to my mantra: “Head Down, Chin Up.” Keep working, keep trying, and keep hoping.

Q: What is the most rewarding?

Everything.  Really, truly.  When I figure out how to close up the plot hole, it’s awesome. When a good review comes in, it’s rewarding. When readers email to tell me they love my work, or quote some line that made them laugh, then all the hard work is worth it.

When the rejections come in, I tell myself it’s a stepping stone, and one day I’ll look back and be grateful, so I may as well start practicing gratitude right now…when the pages don’t work and I’m still stuck on chapter one, I tell myself it’s like lifting weights and it makes me stronger…

Of course, stuffing myself full of chocolate and having a philosophy of “Oh, a bad thing happened? Here, have wine and chocolate” and “Oh, a good thing happened? Here, have wine and chocolate,” is also very rewarding.

Q: How do you think book publishing has changed over the years?

I think it’s one of those “the more things change, the more they stay the same.”  I read somewhere that in Thomas Jefferson’s time, there were more newspapers in circulation than are in circulation now.  If I’m right about the information, the article said that people just used to print off their newspapers/novels, then hand sell, which all seems very grass roots and cool.

Since then, the industry shifted into a more…centralized (if I can use that word) model.  Authors/journalists write, then submit to publishing houses…but now, with the Internet, e-books, Kobo, Kindle, and Sony, and not to mention the recession and the closure of publishing houses, everything seems to be shifting back.  I’m seeing a lot of small, independent publishers coming up…to me, it all seems very exciting and adventurous.

Q: If you had one wish, what would that be?

Easy peasy.  Free chocolate for everyone. There is nothing chocolate can’t solve. I mean, war, famine, peace on earth—you can’t wish that stuff. That’s all grunt work, hard effort…if the mystics/spiritualists/religious folks are right about the earth being a global manifestation of our inner lives, then you see what I mean about the sweat, tears, and brutal honesty that’s got to be involved in solving any world crises.  And you know what makes a hard job more pleasant?  Chocolate.  I figure you give everyone free chocolate and world peace is forty-eight hours away.  Seventy-two, tops.

Q: If you could be anywhere in the world other than where you are right now, where would that place be?

Right now, I’m in my study, trying to convince the dogs to give me ten more minutes of uninterrupted work (to which Milo responds by climbing on my chair and shoving my slipper in my face), Gus is sleeping on the chair (after having spent a good fifteen minutes knocking everything off my desk), Murphy’s under the desk and taking up all the foot room, and Remus is sitting by the door, calling for play time…in other words, baby, t’ain’t no place in this world that can hold a candle to this place, right here.

Q: Your book has just been awarded a Pulitzer.  Who would you thank?

My first thought, holy crap, I guess I’d have to thank the Dark Lord, but that makes me uncomfortable because it must have meant I sold my soul, and I think that’s impossible…namely, because it’s in hock right now to the Not-So-Dark-Lord, the Off-White-Lord on account of a chocolate shortage in the house and my desperate need for cocoa, nuts, and nugget…me and a Pulitzer…huh…I’d like to believe that happened without any virgin sacrifices or volcanoes, and I think the first “person” to come to mind would be God…and then, depending on how the four horsemen of the apocalypse were doing in their fiery charge from the heavens, I’d thank my husband, friends, and family for loving and supporting me, my furry ones for keeping me healthy by eating all my food…then, the pulpit would probably explode and I’d have to run cover…

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